DFC #56
"The doctor said if I hold my arms like this it won't hurt as much. Damn it, I knew I shouldn't have gone to Walmart for breast implants!"The Aggie
Owwww!! I shouldn't have called Dogbert an 'egg with legs'. @^$!^$ Dog bit my arm !!anon
...and this is how the Chinese hand-sign the words, "fuck you!"kraken
Oh no, the old "trick" elbow's actin' up. Hailstones the size of canned hams gonna be a'comin'.Munkihed
. . . and as she recalled the exact wording of her deal with Darkness, she realized that though she would always appear young, her body was, in truth, beginning to decay at an alarming rate. And she wept, not so much from the pain of the arthritus, but from the knowledge that a colostomy bag could not be far behind . . .Scavenger Boy
I wish I could play "Born to be Wild" with my armpit like Billy.Jadie
My hand's magnetized to my elbow. Fuckin' science fair. Doofus
Owww! Goddamn .357magnum kicks like a sumbitch!Rev.Oley
Last time I practice Gymkata without proper parental supervision!Nethicus
I've run out of useable veins. Now how am I going to get my fix?anon
Ow...Dammit, Keane, if you'd give us a square panel like everyone else, I wouldn't have hit my elbow on its edge.Greg J
Writing all these memoirs has given me a writer's cramp from hell!Greg J
watch out for my ATOMIC ELBOW DROP!NoTHiNG
Dolly's vast knowledge of the obscene gestures of Southern Italy made her the envy of the entire neighborhood. anon
I have a mad compulsion to drive wasps, stinger-first, into my elbow; yet, the pain somehow makes me feel ALIVE.anon
I am _TOO_ suffering "Moderate to Severe Pain"! Fork over a couple o' Demerol, Gramma, before I kick your ass again!VPD
Daddy's friend Roy was playin' "Aunt Bee as Roller Derby Queen" again and mowed me down in the hallway without lookin' back!VPD
Ow! You will not believe what that Not Me fucker just did!Greg J
I bumped my funny bone! What sort of demented God would allow this to happen?Greg J
Whoa, man! You ever really get into your elbows? Hey, pass me another brownie.Greg J
Funny bone my ass! It hurts like a son-of-a-bitch!Meli O'Girl
Soon the poison darts would take effect and the pygmies would have their supper.DMW
FUCK!zazu
Mommy! I hurt my elbow on Jeffy's face!Magus
Mommy! I think the spirit of Popeye is back!! My forearm is swelling up and I'm startin' to crave me spinach!Bozo
Dolly never got used to her late Aunt Edna speaking through her elbow, and Edna's latest message of Dolly's impending orphanhood was particulary troubling. anon
Fuckin' Xavier! Who says 'Glowing-Elbow Girl' won't sell comic books? I mean, I *can't* be any stupider than Jubilee!Riff
In the instant before life left her body forever, Dolly noted with irony that dotted lines could track drive-by bullets as easily as they could little kids.Riff
Aaaaaa! My elbow! It's giving birth to a whole litter of those dotted lines! They'll chase Billy to death!The Outsider
Ow! GodDAMN it, I think I hyperextended my arm on that last "Heil!".Craig
While painful at first, Dolly's jailhouse tattoo would be treasured for a lifetime.anon
Mommy!! P.J.'s got the taser again!!J.J.J. Schmidt
With pain comes pleasure,with pain comes pleasure...spazzamajazz
The Geiger counter! Quickly!Rishmawy
Oh, Christ, the demons are talking through my elbow again!! Quick PJ, quick! Draw the Pentagram and get some candles!! Billy, the virgin, run and get the virgin!!!!Clay
Dolly definitely did not appprove of Billy's acupuncture technique.The Lawyer
How to Draw Cartoons, Lesson 69: From the downturned mouth, tears, and pain rays radiating from the area around the elbow, we can immediately tell that the subject is in pain. Of course, this particular cartoonist has obviously failed Lesson 2: How to Draw Nostrils.The Lawyer
Mommy, Jeffy's mean! I threw an elbow to his head, and he turned so I hit the steel plate in his skull! Make him stop!GroundFault
AAAHHH!! Billy you said this smack was the clean shit, you bastard!Nebish
*sniff* All I did was *sniff* try to get a piece of pizza, *sniff* and Billy hits me with a baseball bat.The Unmasked Revenger
Jesus, Billy, how stupid can you get? VooDoo dolls are a hoax, that thing'll never wo-- OUCH!! PULL THE PIN OUT!! PULL THE PIN OUT!!The Unmasked Revenger
Oh, I can't get that Italian Salute down right!Geoff
Shit! Call Radio Shack, Mommy -- my bionic arm is fucked up again!Kittycat
Dolly senses that having Bil move the family to Chernobyl was not in her best interests.--Tom
Billy told me it was just a big bristly kitty cat!Mikael Behrens
Ow! Damn radioactive spider!anon
Help! Dotted lines are attacking my elbow!Tazabby
Back to the DFC Archive index