..So there we were, in the middle of the freakin' Mojave dessert..no food, no water and no hope. That's when Bil says: "Hey, I know! You kids can survive by ingesting my sperm!" That's when we realized he set us up..Flapjack
...and so when the earthquake hit, I had to find a safe place for them. Look, I'm really sorry, but what's more important; millions of ants that depend on *me* for their very lives, or these crappy shoe substitutes?The Almighty Afro
Life sure has been strange since they built that nuclear power plant next door! Who ever heard of "foot dandruff"?anon
"Now that he's spontaneously combusted, this'll be the last hand-me-downs I get from Billy, huh!"Larry Hastings
Boy, I never thought we could piss off a monastery until you dared me to trample their mandala. So, what exactly is a "hell realm"?The Smoking Mirror
Gramma got a sand box for her cat's!!!EriK
Can you beleive that stupid border patrol yob went straight for the body cavity search and didn't even check my shoes! quanto
This is the last time I let you talk me into stealing salt from a restaurant. Meli O'Girl
I gotta hand it to him...Pig-Pen put up one HELL of a fight for his Air Jordans... Doc Evil
But the cool thing about this whole shark attack ordeal is that I get in free at the beach now. Of course it's hard to play firsbee with this here prosthetic leg.Truant
I don't think I can hold this steady any longer. Why can't Daddy just buy a damn clock?Charlie Steinhice
Mommy? I think I'm gonna need a bidet.Truant
So with all this powdred silicon, I figure we can re-attach your nose and mouth to your general "head" area.Truant
...And then PJ wouldn't get off the slide and all these kids started hitting him and kicking him and stuff. It was so funny! It was the best day at the playground ever!Leroy Lockhorn
Mommy, I think it's 'bout time we 'constipated' our relationship - right here in this bed!Schickelgruber
Boy that pumice stone really did a job on my callouses.Tazabby
But having my memories of Grandpa with me at all times just isn't enough! ....and there's plenty left in that stupid urn anyway.c'mon just one dead person's ashes joke...just one?
Look mom! I found the shattered dreams and crumbled hopes of yours that everyone is always talking about...HA HA HA ha ha..heh...heh......yeah ok...sorry, I'll get the vacuum cleaner. Scooby
Nah. It's not sand. Billy sold me part of his Ark of the Covenant!!Huggy the Bearish
'And the funny thing is, the "Shoe" gang is doing a gag about being in a "Circus of Families" three cartoons up.'keldog
But do ya wanna know what the best thing about the nude beach was?Truant
The subatomic binding force of my shoes' molecules has become negated? Oh, great...I bet this is going to be another damned "The Keane's transporter system malfunctions" episode...Rotter
You think this sucks? Just wait till you get to my underwear and you'll wish we'd gone to a nude beach like I suggested.Mike Smith
I put Dolly in the Food Dehydrator. She'll keep for months.geezer
There's a church in Mexico where the statue of Mary cries tears of blood. Members of the faithful develop spontaneous stigmata. And what do WE get? Vomiting shoes. I hate this strip.The 4-Star Pope
I've developed a way to distil the sweat from my feet and extract the natrual salts expunged from my body. I can sell this crap to those "organic" health food stores for $.68 a pound!King Moonraiser
How the hell could my feet get into my shoes with all this sand? Hmm ... just as I suspected; these are TARDIS sneakers!Riff
Watching that volcano erupt really was fun, huh Mom? Too bad about the rest of the family though.Anastasia
Those bastards on the soap opera get an hourglass metaphor for their lives, we get shoes. How fucking appropriate.Preacher/Judge
If I, could save time, in a bootie... Ha! Get it?Ravecavy
Gee, damn - another shoeful of sand! Guess Dad's precious #3 nib won't be looking so hot after this one, eh?Rusty Russell
I figure, hey, what the hell, YOUR dreams are already shattered, right? So what's a little sand on the floor of someone who has nothing to live for anyways? Enjoy your castoffs from the vibrant and young!Skywise
The tunnel is nearly complete. I've been smuggling the dirt out this way for weeks. Dad doesn't suspect a thing... soon, we'll all breathe the sweet air of freedom.Paul Roub
Dumb ol' Dolly JUST had to look back at Sodom.Lot
You are REALLY stoned mom! Do you have the slightest idea what we're doing right now? Mom?Gromble
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