DFC #120

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

Y'know, I wouldn't be smilin' if I was the one who looked like Sam Donaldson...anon

Shoebox Greetings, my scrumptious little morsel!Mr. Fabulous

Hmmm .... pussy ...... box ..... warm ..... friendly ..... HEY! Dolly! Jeffy!! Come quick!! I FOUND the Impossible Zone!!Vice Pope Doug

I oughta be a mortician! You can't even see Kittycat's other side, which is classic "raw hamburger-road pizza" exposed muscle tissue an' crushed bone! Damn, I'm good!Vice Pope Doug

I'd be smilin' too, if all I had to do all day was eat, sleep, an' sit around and lick myself!Vice Pope Doug

Hey guys! I found something to replace our missing football!Tazabby

Look, Arbuckle lost you fair and square. And there is no lasagna in this house. Hell, there isn't any food in this house...so just deal with it! Tazabby

"There you are, Jones. Now let's get to the shuttle...wait a minute...didn't this happen already to Harry Dean Stanton?"Paul T. Riddell

Guess what Kittycat! There's a party in the blender and you're invited!Cheezo

This is the last time I send Jeffy out for pussy!Marion Berry, D.C.

Hey dad. When you were my age, did you ever have a big oozing sore on your dick that hurt every time you cornholed the cat?paTRICK heSTER

KittyKat, don't you understand?! Now that Barfy's run away, all the DFCers are gonna come looking for YOU when dad cooks up an eating scene!Magus, Dark Lord of Captions

Considering the size of the hamster I used to keep in there, you ought to be coughing up quite a hairball.anon

A disection kit, and a cat! This is the best birthday yet!Jan Keilek

Hey, GREAT Leonard Nimoy Impression! Now do Shatner!Doc Evil

Judging by the look of it, Kitty's been possessed by the spirit of Chairman Mao!Don Spudleone

Um, Dad? This isn't quite what I mean by wanting "a bit of tail with a leather fetish" for my birthday.Paul S.

"Hmm... not bad... not bad at all... hey, Dolly! Get me my good skinning knife! I've got an idea that'll revolutionize footwear!"Adam Cadre

I did as you told me, mister. They're all dead. Thanks for telling me they were aliens plotting to control our minds!Pastor of Muppets

Well, it's either this or mend the inflatable doll... SIGHPastor of Muppets

You're wising up Kittycat. At least, PJ's not the only one smart enough to walk around here with his eyes closed all the time. We all try to block out as much as we can.Scoats

Ya' know, I couldn't figure out why you were always hiding out in Mom's closet, when suddenly it just dawned on me........It's that musky tuna smell!kafka

(Fucking Marty never returns my fucking calls. Some agent. Gets me a 40-year contract doing this retard gig! Well, here goes..another day, another dollar.) Look , Kittycat's a size 9! (15% my ass...).)I AM DAMO SUZUKI

Dammit! I put the return address on the box again! What was I thinking!Yoyo Mama

Won't Daddy be surprised when he finds out we got him that "new pussy" he's always griping about not getting.Roach Clip Benny

Get out of my bed you bastard.Cheezo

The psilosybin had begun to work its magic. Billy found the Chesire Cat lying down in place of his collection of vintage Butthole Surfers tapes.Roach Clip Benny

There's a Bill T. Cat here to see you. If you don't give back his stash, he's going to cough up hairballs everywhere.Anastasia

Nice try! There's no hiding though! The cooks down at Fu Lam's offered good money for you, so say goodbye to the nice DFC readers!Vincent Vega

There's gotta be a "Puss 'n Boots" gag here somewhere, but I'll be fucked if I know what it is.The Lawyer

This is amazing. The cat and the box are alright, but apparently I am the same size as a size 9 shoe!anon

Judging from that smile on your face, I'd say your "date" with Garfield has gone extremely well. Tazabby

Oh, don't get me wrong, Dad...the "Cat (space) Box" gag is a real howl. I'm just more amused by the idea of a shoe company named "Cornjob."Rotter

OK: Daddy put the cat in the shoebox, Mom's new pumps in the stroller, and the casserole in the litterbox. Which means that PJ's probab...AIEEEEEE! MOM! MOMMMMM!!!!Rotter

Size 9? Man, that bitch has boats for feet.Anastasia

Goat Blood, Cat Blood. What the fuck's the difference?Cheezo

See, Dolly? All it takes is a teaspoon of litter and Kittykat will poop ANYWHERE. Now go fetch Thel's "Come Fuck Me" stilettos before the mailman gets here.Dave the Fave

What're you so happy about? Now that Barfy's gone, who do you think's gonna be on the table when the next "eating" cartoon comes around?Riff

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