I got us some more L's so Dadddy can start spelling his name right.Robert
Would you believe all of the playground equipment in the park is held together with only two pins?DMW
Hey, Mommy, look! I got some sticks so we can build something and actually have more than one bloody piece of furniture in the house at a time!The Outsider
Hey everyone! I stole some interpanel dividers from Dennis's strip. Now they'll have to have a groupfuck scene!Ethelred
I got the last two earwax candles left at Thrifty. Who wants to go first?Ethelred
Hey, ya remember how Daddy used to be the only member of this family with a normal-shaped head? Well, not anymore!Kurt L.
...and so I took off the wiper blades, and now Billy's playing Spirograph on the windshield!Scott Ryan
HEY MOM! There was a great big explosion in the air and these came raining down out of the sky! Living in New York is so cool!Yakko
Thursday. Finally my turn to beat PJ about the face and neck.Skillet
Guess who's the new drummer for Smashing Pumpkins?The Sandman
Hey we got gifts from Uncle Ted in jail! What are pipe bo....."The last words the Family Circus ever spoke again."Monk n Treb
Geez, after what happened to John Lennon, I figured that Ringo would have had more security than that!jerright
Hey Mom! Can I crucify PJ?Jake
So, sticks and stones will break your bones, Billy? Thanks for the tip!jerright
Your special order came in at the drug store, Mom! Boy, these are HONKING tampons, aren't they?That Guy
Anyone makes fun of my jacket, they get it in both eyes.MechaGumby
"That blind guy down the street won't be hogging the sidewalk any more!"Mr. Clean
Look, Helga! They had a two for one sale! Got any triple A batteries?MechaGumby
Ok, I got the roman candles. Now where's the dog?zazu
Yeah, I know the Annie Hall look was in 16 Years ago, but hey, progress is progress!zazu
I'd like to see those bastards at the nuclear plant try to shut down their reactor without these!Westur the Unspeakable
Guess what? Barfy found Grandpa! Can I keep these?halaq
You put 'em together, use some glue, and they make a long stick! Billy sold 'em to me for my change jar with $25.00 in it! Cool, huh?Vice Pope Doug
I'm playin' "Vlad the Impaler"! Jeffy, I need to borrow your guinea pigs .....Vice Pope Doug
"Nine lives," my ass!Kurt L.
...and if you keep hitting it, the bruise goes from blue, to purple, to green! Go see for yourself, it's cool!Kurt L.
Dad says I'm as annoying as a short stick in the ass. Let's find out.Dark Roger
Look, don't ask how I opened the door with these sticks in my hand.
I used the Force, okay? how's that?Elessar
Years of PCP abuse had a permanent affect on Dolly's sense of reality. Recently, she had spent three full weeks thinking she was Ringo Starr..Tazabby
Well, I had to do some really unmentionable things to Dad with these sticks, but look! I'm finally out of that goddam uniform!Anastasia
Ha! The fools! They handed over the nuclear weapon plans for a briefcase full of monopoly money! As soon as I sell these to the Iraqis, I be on my way to Buenos Aires.Anastasia
Today, at my Future Businesswomyn of America meeting, we learned how to destroy men with these two sticks. If anyone wants me, I'll be practicing on Jeffy.Anastasia
Shrinking? Don't know what you're talking about. So, anyone want a french fry?Kurt L.
Why didn't Bil Keane just go ahead and write "sex toy" on those things?Ted the who gives a damn?
INCOMING DILDO JOKES!The Lawyer
Don't worry...I put the saw and the ladder right back where I found them. OK, now, Daddy's going to start painting the house tomorrow morning, so make sure you charge the camcorder batteries.Rotter
Gee daddy, *thanks*. Nice suit, only tie is missing. Then you wonder where the DFC is getting their ideas for bull dyke jokes.Zebra
They're having a fire sale at the church, and I got the True Shinbones of St. Jude!karne
Daddy, you're right. The bo sticks work better than the quarterstaff on Jeffy.Non Anon
OK girls, I've got the mop handles. How about that game of Women in Prison?paTRICK heSTER
I won first prize at the Junior Lesbian Activist Fashion Show!! I got posters of k.d. lang an' Melissa Etheridge!Vice Pope Doug
A hit offa one of THESE an' you'll be giggling 'til you piss yourself at anything that moves!!Vice Pope Doug
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