DFC #265

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

Keane's Celestium is exemplary of the Heaven/Earth/Hell representations. The Lord in the Heavens nourishes the thriving growth of the Church on earth. Meanwhile below, demons torture the misshapen souls of sinners. Like Bosch's Garden of Earthly Delights, most of the action takes place in this bottom plane....phil

PJ, bored with yet another round of Choo-Choo, formulates an elegant solution to the Twin Prime Conjecture. Alas, by the time he learned to speak, he had forgotten its most crucial detail.Heath

If she doesn't start reflecting soon, Operation Stake-through-the-heart is a go!anon

(*hic*) You're right, mom, (*urrrp*) you can drink us under the (*hic*) table!The Unmasked Revenger

The Keane children thought that they had dug the escape tunnel far enough to make it to the sports page...unfortunately, their tunnel only went as far as the dining room.The Unmasked Revenger

"No need, Thel. PJ already peed in there twice today."Randall

Mommy, can we stop playin' mimes-in-the-glass-box now?Namgubed the Merry Elf

"And the Lord spake unto them, saying 'Make thee a fort of thy cheap-ass K-Mart dining room table, and gird it around with unbalanced chairs. Upon the holy fort place a fern, and have thy valium-addled mother water it well. Gather thyself and thy verminous siblings thereunder; from the coming destruction shall thee be spared, and thy psychotic parents will bother thee no more.'" Melonheads 6:15L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg

Ignore the children, pretend I'm Jackie Kennedy getting ready for a State dinner...ignore the children, pretend I'm Jackie Kennedy getting ready for a State dinner...ignore the children...Radio Show

As Dolly called out 'Daddy's home', I quickly poured the pitcher of martini's into the centerpiece. Twelve steps away from the Circus by Thel KeaneRadio Show

Duck!! Daddy will be turning the key in the ignition any second now!Radio Show

"See? You can tell when Daddy stopped smoking: The dark brown ones have all dried up and flaked off. The ones that remain are greener because they had more moisture at 'harvest time'."phonsux

"Woa! Mom's testosterone therapy is progressing nicely. Real nicely.Boston

"Kind of reminds me of when we were all still living in Thel's vagina. We were always squished, being poked in the head by dead wood and constantly getting leaked on."helen keller, blind n mute midwife

"Dude, I hear that if you drink the water after it's trickled through, you get a monster high."Tangent

Hark! Who dares approach the Fort of Incestuous Fondling?!Nobody's uncle

It's no use. She obeys the Fern now.sigar

In this tragic panel, PJ, imaking his first appearance in weeks, is accidently killed by an overly aggressive chair.Podbeing

Mom, why are you watering the salad?Riff

Strung out on Isopropyl Alcohol and Scope cocktails, Thel blissfully watered the silk flower arrangement naked from the waist down. She could hear the nattering of her Satan-spawned melon heads, but finally she had found herself a cocktail that made her too drunk to care. xian

Your turn, Mom -- left foot on red!Namgubed the Merry Elf

Twenty seconds later, pinned under a support beam, Thel changed her mind and decided that animals really could detect earthquakes.Westur the Unspeakable

Mommeeee! Jeffy lost at Under-The-Table-Monopolcheesi fair an' square -- but now he won't blow Barfy!Vice Pope Doug

We're a sovereign nation now, Mommy. So fuck off.Vice Pope Doug

Wow! All of us Keane kids in a wacky, mildly cute situation? File this one under new!The Boy

Avant-garde art pioneer Bil Keane experiments with "No-Point Perspective."Jizmo the Wonder Horse

Thel was nearing the end of her "To do" list. Put away children: check. Water plants: check. Murder husband and consummate new marriage to Satan, Dark Prince of Hell: check. Alas, the bathroom grout would have to wait until tomorrow.Jizmo the Wonder Horse

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